The Darkness You Fear Page 23

  Jed followed her without question. Unlike most men, he treated her as an equal, for he’d seen how she’d handled herself on the long trek westward. She’d turned down more than one proposal for marriage, waiting for him. Sadly, it had taken Edwin’s disappearance to finally bring Jed to her side.

  Becky went unerringly to the exact spot where she had once bent down to pick up the shiny quartz from the creek and fill a small blue bucket with it.

  She’d learned a thing or two about gold since then: how placer gold was washed down a creek from a source upstream, which could be anywhere amid so much territory that a miner could spend his life looking for the mother lode.

  She examined the hillside above, immediately spotted the fresh rockfall, and sensed that the slide had been designed to hide what was beneath it.

  They camped by the dry creek and found a spot where someone had dug into the sand for water. In the morning, they set to work pulling the rocks away from the entrance of the mine. It took them most of the morning, but it wasn’t as bad as it looked, and by early afternoon, they managed to open a small hole.

  It took them the rest of the day to widen it so that it was large enough for someone to slip through.

  “We should shore it up,” Jed said dubiously as small rocks continued to slide by them.

  “We’ll only be inside for a short time,” Becky said.

  Jed picked up some dry branches and examined them. “Someone’s used these before,” he said. “You go down and fix supper, and I’ll see if I can stabilize this a little.”

  “You go make supper,” she said. “You’re the better cook.” She grabbed the branches out of his hands, laughing.

  He pretended to be shocked. “All right,” he said. “We’ll both starve. Come on, the quicker we get this done, the quicker we can go to bed.”

  His voice trailed off at those last words. Each night of the trip, they had slept in separate bedding near the campfire, but close together for warmth. Becky had wanted to turn to Jed and open her arms to him, but she well knew where that would lead, and while she might have welcomed it, she knew that Jed thought of himself as a gentleman and would think less of himself. She tried not to entice him, but each night, it had become harder not to give in to temptation.

  It was nearly dark by the time they finished shoring up the entrance, and as much as Becky longed to light a torch and explore the mine, they descended the hill and returned to camp. They gnawed on some jerky and hardtack, washed it down with silty water, and went to bed. Fortunately, the hard labor of digging had made them so exhausted that they both immediately fell asleep.

  In the morning, it seemed as if they were both reluctant to approach the mine entrance.

  We don’t know what we’ll find, Becky thought.

  When they finally stood in front of the mine, they stayed there for the longest time. Then, with snort of exasperation, Becky ducked down and crawled through the hole they’d made. She heard Jed following her.

  The first thing she saw was the gold. There was enough light to see the shimmering in the walls, and Becky instantly knew that this was the mother lode, but instead of it making her glad, her heart sank, for it was final proof that Jonathan Meredith possessed a secret important enough to kill for.

  There was a stack of torches near the entrance, constructed of juniper branches wrapped in grasses. She lit one of them and went to the back of the chamber. There were two tunnels there, but one was obviously unused, while the other showed footprints in the dust.

  She turned and looked at Jed, who appeared pale and ghostly in the torchlight. He swallowed, then nodded her on.

  They crept forward, frightened every step of the way at what they might find. They reached the end of the tunnel. There was nothing there except tool-marked rocks. Quietly, they went back to the front of the mine. Becky wasn’t sure if she was relieved or disappointed. It was clear that they would have to explore the other tunnel, but she was so exhausted that she was ready to call it quits, even though the day was only half over.

  Jed agreed that they should rest, and they went down and gathered their camping gear and brought it up to the mine.

  “What about our horses?” Becky asked.

  “I’ll hobble them loosely,” he said. “They won’t go too far, but they’ll be able to forage.”

  “Unless the coyotes get them,” she said.

  He shook his head, smiling. “They’ll be safe enough. And I’m looking forward to not being so cold. Let’s get a fire going.”

  The fire warmed up the cave quickly, especially when Jed got up and covered the entrance with one of the horse blankets. The stone floor was harder than the desert sands, but Becky felt safe and secure. Jed lay only a few feet away.

  What would happen if I kissed him? she wondered. Would he kiss me back? Would he take my in his arms? Would he…?

  She felt a surge of guilt at the thought, as if she was somehow betraying Edwin. Poor Edwin, who had always had a crush on her. She’d tried to gently discourage him, and he had never taken it very far, but she knew he had never fallen out of love with her.

  The world shrank down into guilt and shame.

  It was as if everything Becky had ever done wrong, every unkind word, every discourtesy, every angry argument, besieged her mind with regret. Beside her, Jed moaned, and she looked over to see if he was asleep. His eyes were glittering, staring upward in torment.

  She fell in and out of sleep, until she couldn’t tell where reality began and nightmare ended. Part of her realized that what she was seeing and feeling was in the past. She would wake up from the memories, and then, just as she began to wonder upon it, she’d be dragged back in.

  She remembered hiding from Edwin, not wanted to have to deal with his puppy love, and it seemed like a terrible thing.

  At last, she sat up with an anguished cry, and Jed sat bolt upright next to her. And then he did what she’d always hoped for; he reached out for her.

  They embraced, and it was as if all Becky’s hopes came together in that one moment, illuminating the truth that neither of them could avoid; that they were meant to be together forever.

  “I’m sorry, Becky,” Jed said. “I should have come to you sooner. But my father…disapproved of you. I thought if I could prove my worth to him that he’d come around. That he’d accept our union.” His voice cracked, and it seemed to shock him. He pulled away from her. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what’s happening to me. I’ve never felt this way.”

  A shudder went through him, and Becky took him back into her arms. She didn’t think any less of him for his emotions, but she knew that he was embarrassed.

  “I never thought Jonathan would hurt Edwin,” he said. “I wondered if…I wondered about Allie and Cager, but wouldn’t let myself believe it. But Edwin…”

  She tried to reassure him despite not believing her own words. “We don’t know that anything has happened. Perhaps he did go to California, as the letter said.”

  “No,” Jed said. “He wouldn’t do that without telling me first.”

  Becky stared at Jed in the darkness, and it appeared to her that a faint light was glowing around him. The same light swirled around her. If she concentrated hard, she could push the lights away for a moment and again see what was real.

  And then the guilt overwhelmed her again.

  Allie and Cager. She’d known what had happened to them. They had all known. But none of them had done anything about it, because they couldn’t prove it.

  But that none of that should have mattered. She should have tracked down Jonathan Meredith and made him pay for his crimes. Instead, she had run away.

  And because of that, Edwin was dead.

  She realized she had known that he was dead the moment they’d crawled into the mine. She had sensed the ghosts of Allie, Cager, and Edwin immediately, though she couldn’t admit it to herself. It was as if they had been waiting for her. She didn’t say anything now, but saw the same distress on Jed’s face, as if he too was feel
ing their presence.

  They held and comforted each other for a time. Then, suddenly, he was kissing her, his hands reaching under her clothes, and she knew she should stop him, but she wanted him to continue. In the darkness, surrounded by ghosts, they made love.

  And yet, the spirit of Edwin didn’t seem to blame or haunt them. It was as if they had been forgiven, which almost made it worse. The guilt and shame didn’t lessen, but intensified. Allie, Cager, and Edwin had been left abandoned in the dark, with no one to mourn for them. If it had been Becky, she would have been angry and vengeful.

  She tried to speak to the spirits in her mind. Once, as she was drifting off the sleep, she heard Jed say, “Is that you, Edwin?” But the ghosts seemed only vaguely aware of their own existence. There were no thoughts there, only emotions, fear and regret and, most of all, bewilderment.

  ***

  In the morning, neither of them wanted to leave the front of the cave. But as they lay in each other’s arms, the guilt and shame returned. Jed broke away from her. He had a grim look on his face. “We need proof,” he said. “We have to find them.”

  They decided to explore the second tunnel, which looked much like the tunnel they had explored the day before, but instead of ending in a dead end, this shaft ended in a cave-in. There was a huge gap above them and a steep slag-filled slope below them.

  They hesitated. Something emanated from the dark recesses; they felt presences other than Allie, Cager, and Edwin—and these spirits weren’t so forgiving. These ghosts were angry at Jed and Becky for invading their resting place.

  “I can’t go any farther,” Becky said. “Not now.”

  Jed put his arm around her, and they retreated. Without a word, they embraced, then lay down on the blankets and made love again, slowly this time, still feeling regret and sweet pain and guilt all mixed together.

  ***

  They awoke to the sound of men’s voices outside the mine. As afraid as Becky had been the night before as she was assailed by the memories of the past, it was the sound of one man’s voice that made it all real.

  She would have recognized Jonathan Meredith’s voice anywhere.

  She hesitated, and then, before Jed could stop her, she stuck her head out of the entrance. Men were walking toward them, but her eyes settled on one thickset man with a big, black beard. “Stay back!” she cried. “I’ve got a gun trained on you.”

  She waved her arm behind her, and Jed put a rifle in her hand. She took a bead on Meredith’s chest.

  Her finger tightened on the trigger…and she hesitated. All during the brief conversation she and Jed had with Meredith, Becky thought about shooting him; she just couldn’t quite bring herself to do it.

  Someone else shot first. One of the men below them grabbed his neck and toppled over. Becky couldn’t make sense of it. Were they fighting each other? She saw movement in the trees behind the campground. An Indian rose up out of the desert, aimed a rifle at the men below, and fired. The men began running for the mine.

  Becky withdrew and looked at Jed. “What do we do?” she asked.

  “We have to let them in,” Jed said. “It isn’t just Meredith out there.”

  She stood up and walked to the back of the chamber. Jed joined her, and they both pointed their rifles at the entrance, waiting to see who would appear first.

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Lost Blue Bucket Mine, Oregon Territory, October 1851

  Virginia dove through the entrance and rolled onto the rocky surface of the cave floor, barely missing the campfire at the center of the chamber. Angus and Drake were scrambling deeper into the cave, and Virginia hurried to join them. Only then did she turn around to see what was happening.

  They were in the midst of an armed tableau, frozen for the moment, with the two sides pointing guns at each other. Jed and Becky both had rifles aimed at the men across from them, while Meredith and his men had weapons pointed back at them. It was an uneven fight, perhaps, but no one had fired the first shot.

  Virginia recognized Becky instantly.

  It came as a shock that she was a young woman, not a girl. In Virginia’s mind was the image of the Becky Catledge in Ellen Meredith’s diaries, a plucky young girl who rode and shot better than most men, who had stared down a grizzly. But of course, that story was years in the past now.

  To her surprise, Virginia realized that Becky was actually a couple of years older than her. She had similar coloring, blonde hair and blue eyes, but she was a bigger girl than Virginia, with sturdier arms and legs, her features broader and more open.

  Becky’s eyes were fixed on Jonathan Meredith, and her finger was tightening on the trigger of her rifle. Virginia stepped into the line of fire.

  “Stop, Becky,” she said. Becky stared at her curiously and lowered her rifle slightly to one side, at the ready. “My name is Virginia Reed. Your mother sent me to find you.”

  “My mother sent you? …And my father?”

  Virginia turned away, wondering what to say, but Becky caught the shadow flow across her face.

  “Damn you, Meredith!” Becky cried. She raised her rifle again, and Meredith, for once, was caught by surprise, his rifle no longer pointing at Becky.

  “No!” Virginia cried out, blocking the shot again, raising her hands. “You must not do this, Becky. Jonathan Meredith will see justice, I promise you that.”

  “You don’t know him,” Becky said grimly.

  Unexpectedly, Angus broke in. “The lass is right, Miss Reed. He’s guilty as hell.”

  “I won’t execute a man without a trial,” Virginia said.

  “You had no problem hanging that fellow who robbed the stagecoach,” Drake reminded her.

  “That was different,” Virginia said. But was it really? she wondered. While she hadn’t actually seen Meredith kill anyone, there was little doubt that he’d done so. “We caught him in the act. We have no absolute proof of Meredith’s guilt.”

  Angus shook his head sadly. “That’s just it, Miss Reed. Men like Meredith get away with it; they cover up their crimes too well to be caught. You know he’s guilty. It’s a mistake to let him live.”

  Meredith had recovered his aplomb and was watching and listening with a bemused smile. “You folks seem to forget you’re outgunned. But I don’t understand why you think I’m such a bad man.”

  “You admitted to killing Gus Catledge,” Angus said, giving Becky a quick, worried glance. The girl blanched but didn’t pull the trigger.

  “In self-defense,” Meredith said. “I’m sorry it happened, but you can’t deny a man a chance to defend himself. You folks were my prisoners. Ask yourselves: Why did I let you live? Did you think of that?”

  Virginia had thought about it, and she had her suspicions. She’d seen how Meredith had eyed her when he thought she wasn’t looking. But she suspected the real reason was that not all his men were ready to kill for him in cold blood. Killing Indians was one thing; killing a woman and unarmed men was another. Samuel, for one, looked like he regretted ever hooking up with this crew. He was sitting with his back to the wall, his head in his hands.

  “This is a mistake,” Jed said to the others. “Meredith fooled me for a long time, but he’s evil. He killed Edwin. And I’m certain he killed Allie and Cager.”

  “I thought Edwin was with you,” Meredith said. “I have no idea what happened to Allie and Cager.”

  “You’re lying,” Becky said. “You murdered them.”

  “Murdered?” Meredith said. “Why would I harm the children? They must have had an accident.”

  “No,” Becky insisted. “It was you.”

  “How can you believe such a thing?” Meredith asked, sounding aggrieved.

  “Because they told me so.” Becky motioned to the cave surrounding them.

  Dead silence greeted this remark as everyone stared at her. Even Samuel lifted his head, looking at her in shock. But despite the silence, Becky sounded so certain that Virginia sensed they believed her.

  “But
if they’re dead,” Samuel asked with a slight fearful shrug. “How could you…?”

  “Is it so hard to believe?” Virginia turned to look at the man. “Can’t you feel them?”

  “Feel what?” Samuel asked, though from his tone and the look on his face, he already knew what she was going to say.

  “There are spirits haunting this place,” Virginia said. “It is a sacred spot for the Indians.”

  Meredith barked out a laugh, looking over at his men. “Spirits? Haunting? Are you talking about ghosts?”

  Virginia didn’t answer.

  “I never believed in such things either,” Angus said, “until I came face to face with them. Believe me, boys, there are spirits and creatures in the wilds that no civilized man would believe in. Search your hearts. Admit you sense something uncanny about this place.”

  Becky handed her gun to Virginia, who was so surprised that she took it without question. Becky walked up to Meredith, putting her face inches from his and fixing him with a glare of such intensity that he backed up a step.

  “If you won’t believe me, then I will show you,” she said. She raised her arms. “I summon the spirits of this place. Give me justice!”

  Ghostly lights appeared in the darkness at the back of the mine. But this was not light that banished the dark, but which suffused it with dread and fear. These were not the ghosts of three young children, but something ancient, primal. The lights swirled, and then, without warning, surged toward them.

  Virginia shuddered as she felt the spirits pass through her, and she stiffened as memories flowed into her. She forced herself to open her eyes.

  Ghostly shapes whirled about the heads of the gunmen. Then, as if picking the most vulnerable target, the spectral lights shot into Samuel’s head, and he cried out. He scrambled for the entrance and started to climb out of the mine.

  “What’s wrong with him?” Meredith shouted. “Stop him!”

  Clement grabbed the boy and pulled him back.